Thursday Figure

It's been a tough week for me. Coming out of a month of doing this full time has been a shock to my system, and I'm really trying to make the best of it, but it's rough. If it were only about me, I would do this full time. I would dive in. I would do whatever was necessary and go all the way until I was where I wanted to be. But the reality is it's not just about me. And I have to work within my present circumstances, considering everyone and everything involved. Again, kicking myself for not starting a long time ago. But no amount of kicking is going to change anything.

I'm going to keep studying on a part-time basis for the time being, which will be a very good thing. It will. My progress won't be as fast or steady as it would be if I were going full time. I know that, and it's a heart-wrenching thought for me. But as I keep reminding myself the past couple years--a little bit of time here and there is infinitely more than nothing at all. And hey, I've come a long way in the past couple years, so even if it's a slow and steady haul, all I can do is keep doing what I can.

I kind of like where I got with this figure last night. I can see how all the different things I've been learning help and inform each other. The extended figure and Bargue influence how I approach these smaller drawings--they all influence each other, and in a perfect world, I could just do it all--there would be endless amounts of time and energy in the day to do and be everything. But I guess it's not a perfect world, is it?